Who Have You Become?
I’m so excited to be back with the Plan Simple Meals Podcast. This week we’re talking about something that can’t wait: getting out of survival mode — and becoming who you really want to be.
As we head out of the pandemic and into a new way, it’s time to recheck in with what you really want. So much is possible—even in the current state of the world! We need to pause and get clear on your vision, in order to plan for it and bring it into reality. You may feel overwhelmed with all the things on your plate right now. You may be ready to just adapt to whatever comes. That’s why this work is essential right now.
Recently I asked a group of FLOW 365ers to reflect on the past 90 days and answer this question: Who have you become? Answers ranged from somebody who exercises every morning to a balanced entrepreneur to a wise woman (hear the whole list when you listen to it—so much good stuff).
When they asked me to answer the same question, I had to think for a while. I have become the mom I really wanted to be. Getting there was messy and uncertain and not what I expected, but I got there, by being intentional and committing to my path—even when the external stuff, the pandemic, my kid’s own struggles—didn’t go the way I expected.
Hear more about:
- Why I learned to look at who we become
- My 90-day plan to be an intentional mom
- What happened when I realized something was wrong and how my adventure in becoming this version of me started
- Learning that my role was not to fix, but to hold space for my kid to feel—and how I learned to do so
- The joy of watching somebody else become
- How I created the support I needed to do my own work of becoming
Doable Changes
ASK WHO HAVE I BECOME. Journal on this question. You can consider the last 90 days or the past year of the pandemic. Do you like who you have become? Are you proud of her? (Don’t ask this to judge, but to help you forward.) How did you become this person? Who do you want to become next?
CREATE A SUPPORT SYSTEM. I could not have become the mother I really wanted to be without support. So often we think we need to do it all alone. That we can’t isn’t a sign of weakness, but of knowing what we need. Start by getting really clear on what you need. Braindump a list of ways people could help you. They could be practical, like making dinner so you can work longer or watching your kids. They could also be things like providing an accountability check-in, listening without trying to fix, sending you encouragement, connecting you with resources … start with a list of what could help, then ask for it. If creating a whole system doesn’t feel doable, ask one person for a specific kind of help. Then build from there.
CREATE BOUNDARIES. We can every everything, but not all at once. One of the reasons I love planning for a 90-day season is that it allows me to go all in and make progress on something, knowing that there will be time to lean into something else. But to go all-in on something, we have to say no to other things. Whether you are dealing with a crisis or committing to something you really want, you’ll need boundaries. Think about something you really want. What are you willing to give up to make it happen? What are your limits? Some examples: I only use Zoom for groups; otherwise I talk on the phone because my head is clearer. My workday starts at 9:30, so I can work on my book first thing and my voicemail and sig line tells people that. As you make your own list, try starting your boundaries For the next 90 days. Add “so that” and your reason to the end of it to keep you focused on your why and who you are becoming.
